Shaq-A-Claus Arrives; Christmas May Begin Now

If you don’t twitter, I pity you, because it means you don’t have a direct pipeline in the mind of Shaquille O’Neal. In addition to uplifting quotes and random thoughts on junk food, the universe, and Shaq’s desire to feed large amounts of peanut butter to the starving children of Africa, you get access to Shaq nuggets like this:↵↵⇥Even the aliens no me, da ones real far, i speak to em like ibadablaa, Jigamagla, bockeraaa↵↵Like the word “anarchy,” I don’t know what it means, but I love it. You also get pictures of Shaq-A-Claus, who kicks the crap out of any fat German man in red pajamas and boots bent on breaking into your house and eating your cookies.↵

↵↵Ignition, Mission Control. We officially have liftoff on the space shuttle Christmas, as Shaq-A-Claus has arrived. I remind you that your life is poorer if you don’t have Shaq twittering away at you, and that the best Christmas album of all time remains Charlie Brown Christmas by the Vince Guaraldi Trio. (Though Nat King Cole’s Christmas album is perfectly acceptable, as well.)↵

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