Carlos Guillen Has Serious ‘Roids Problem

The Tigers are not a good team right now, but things just got considerably more painful for one of their players. Carlos Guillen is suffering from a horrible case of hemorrhoids, and, as if having a horrible case of hemorrhoids isn’t embarrassing enough, his manager felt the need to tell the press about it in unnecessary detail:↵↵⇥“He can hardly move -- he’s got hemorrhoids so bad,” Tigers manager Jim Leyland said Tuesday. “He’s been playing with hemorrhoids that probably need to be lanced. He probably shouldn’t have been out there (third base on Monday).”↵⇥↵⇥Leyland said the hemorrhoids have been bothering Guillen for about four or five days, but they have gotten worse in the last few days. “He could hardly walk (Monday night),” Leyland said.”↵⇥

↵↵Sure, on one hand, if you’re Guillen, you don’t mind your manager making excuses for your poor play -- it sorta lets you off the hook. On the other hand, you have hemorrhoids to such a serious degree that modern medicine is useless -- a freakin’ lancer is required to remove them. And now everyone knows. Yeah, I think if I were Carlos, I’d rather everyone just go on thinking I had a bad game and leave it at that.
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↵(H/T: Big League Stew)
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