Goodbye, Bizarre Olympic Rituals

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↵The Olympics are so weird. Instead of Chicago or Madrid in 2016, we should play them on the moon. It’d make more sense. The absolutely bizarre ritual of it all, the nutty sports, the constant opportunity for the escalation of international tension (Sweden is mobilizing against Cuba after Saturday’s taekwondo attack, I hear).
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↵The Opening Ceremony was a gorgeous affair, replete with robots and lip -synchers with straight teeth and CGI-enhanced fireworks. I imagine the Closing Ceremony -- which has already happened but won’t be shown in North America for about another 12 hours -- will be equally awe-striking. I mean, David Beckham apparently kicks hundreds of soccer balls into the Bird’s Nest crowd! Simply beautiful.
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↵But really, every fourth year is plenty for all this pageantry. The Winter Olympics are a comparatively subdued affair, with curling as the black sheep sport and nationalist parkas replacing jazzy vests and ruffles. And really, if we want to watch mind-blowing choreography and explosions in the sky, we can just go to Cirque de Soleil or something.
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↵I’ll miss handball and George W. Bush cleaning the sand off Misty May’s backside. But I am satisfied for now. Goodbye, Beijing Olympics.↵