Leinart Has Not Officially Lost His Job ... Yet

Chris Mortenson is a hot topic in Arizona right now after reporting on Sunday that Cardinals coach Ken Whisenhunt had already decided on Kurt Warner as the team’s starting quarterback. Yesterday, Whisenhunt refuted Mort’s report (which we are shocked – shocked! – by, seeing as Mortenson and his anonymous sources are right at least 30% of the time):↵↵⇥“Do we have a quarterback? ... It seems like Chris Mortensen is making the decision on our quarterback for our football team. ... But nothing has changed,” Whisenhunt said.↵↵Alright, so for now, the job is still Matt Leinart’s to lose, which we are confident he will. Although deep down, we really, really hope he keeps the starting role just so Mortenson will look foolish. ↵

↵↵⇥As Leinart walked off the practice field, he threw his helmet on the ground and practically baited the media with his eyes. Go on, ask.↵⇥↵⇥“I could care less what he says or anybody else says,” Leinart said. “Obviously, he’s not around here. He doesn’t know what’s going on, and I don’t listen to that stuff.” ↵⇥

↵↵Well, obviously Leinart doesn’t know that Mort might not physically be around there, but he has sources, dammit! His sources are everywhere and nowhere at the same time. They’re both real and make-believe. They exist, but only in the dark shadows of your subconscious! His sources are basically a large network of ninjas, is what I’m trying to say here. And not only are they in Arizona, reporting back to Master Mortenson, but they’re also in Cincy, where they’ve been informed that the team wants to trade Rudi Johnson for a “real receiver,” and in New England, where they’ve discovered that Tom Brady has a “deep bone bruise.”↵