They’re Practically Giving Away Sonics Jerseys

When your team leaves, someone’s left holding all the merch. And something’s got to be done with it. In Seattle, that would be the Sonics official store at Key Arena. You’d think that, in a city that was at least partly to blame for their team walking, this would be nothing more than a punchline. But, as the ↵Seattle Post-Intelligencer reports, instead all those cut-rate Durant jerseys were selling like hotcakes -- until they marked them down too far:↵↵⇥As of today, all Sonics merchandise is 90 percent off at the Sonics & Storm Team Shop at Key Arena. You might think team remains would be flying off the shelves. They’re not. The store was empty at 3:40 p.m., an employee there said. There’s plenty of merchandise left. Apparently, word hasn’t gotten out yet.↵⇥
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↵⇥Fans swarmed the store in July after the city announced its deal to release the NBA team -- now the Oklahoma City Thunder -- from its Key Arena lease. They marked everything down to 75 percent off then.↵↵

↵Two keys (no pun intended) here: First, 75% still had the scent of dignity about it. So on some level, this wasn’t just folks after a bargain. If this was a matter of residual love, or Seattle-ites resorting to some version of the Leitch doctrine, copping gear at 90% off is an insult to the team, to your memories, and to yourself. I won’t lie: Anyone who watched Kevin Durant toward the end of 2007-08, even on that miserable team, could smell greatness in the air. Some fans forged a connection there, and might want to hold onto that as something of value, emotional or otherwise. This latest sale is just too much. There’s also the chance that all the Durant jerseys, or Gary Payton skullies, are long gone, and now all that’s left is graceless, shameful reminders of the Clay Bennett eras. Chris Wilcox is not a hero to most; to wear him is to wallow and degrade one’s former Sonics fandom.↵
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↵Luckily, I have a solution. In addition to having a bunch of basketball-hating liberals, Seattle also hosts one of America’s largest homeless populations. It’s entirely possible that some well-meaning, headline-scanning non-profit went out and copped all of this stuff to distribute among the less-clothed and less-invested in the Sonics situation. So Straight Cash Homey, maybe you’d better gallop up here, at least if you’ve got no qualms about exploiting the humor (and irony) inherent in some bum rocking the Luke Ridnour jersey.↵