Mike Mervine, a Phillies fan, went to Thursday night’s Phillies-Rockies game wearing a rubber skull mask, on which he scrawled the word “PHILLEY” [sic]. He proclaimed to everyone within listening distance that he was the “Rockie killer,” whatever that means. After getting rowdy, stadium personnel asked him to leave.
What an Enterprising Young Man!
↵But Mervine didn’t leave, which is where this story gets amazing. Instead, he wandered around the stadium, eventually walking into the Phillies’ front office. He filled out a job application. Then he stole some World Series rings and left. I know what you’re thinking -- this plan is foolproof! Unfortunately, job applications tend to contain personal information such as the applicant’s name, address, and contact information. And with that, he was apprehended. Freed from the scourge of the “Rockie Killer,” the Rockies won, 5-4.











