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Come Fan with UsWednesday, August 5, 2026

6. Chinese Trading Cards: This Is Why Globalization Is Good

We should all read Hardwood Paroxysm. While I still have no idea what that second word means, it’s an excellent combination of high entertainment and astute analysis. And even if they were terrible, this post makes it completely worth checking out.

They stumbled across a set of photos on Flickr, and the rest is history. A sample:

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Chinese pronunciation: AHHHH-TEST! This is how we should pronounce his name hereafter. And in some weird, Wu-Tang Clan-type thing, Artest would probably love this.

Vince Carter should have a bleached blonde mohawk, right? Sort of fits his ethos.

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They thought Steve Nash was making fun of Asians here, so they made him into a female bodybuilder.

And finally, among a set of current NBA superstars, they included this:

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To be accompanied by this tweet, from Wednesday’s Wizards’ game.

Although let’s not shortchange Yuta Tabuse.

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Chinese trading cards are all well and good, but I’m of the belief that ex-Suns guard Yuta Tabuse had real, mystical powers the likes of which we’ll never fully grasp. Plus, he’s Chinese and 5’9. What can we do to get this man back in the NBA?

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