Ron Artest scares the living hell out of me. Drinking at halftime in games, Appearing in only his boxers on television randomly. Charging into the stands at games like a bull in Pamplona. Telling stories about seeing people getting stabbed with table legs.
Ron Artest Supports Tiger, Confirms Is Not Jesus
↵He’s like the loving, semi-psychotic uncle the online community never had growing up. Artest only adds to this mythos with a supportive open letter to Tiger Woods on Tuesday.
↵↵In reading the statements you have made, I can tell you are a stand up guy. Please remember only Jesus is perfect. You made a mistake and you admitted your infidelity.
↵↵Syllogism complete: if you’re not Jesus, you can just do it and cop to it later. Got it, Ron. Not arguing either, because you terrify me.
↵He also implores writers to out their own affairs to their partners, so I’ll help one of our own start the healing. Skip Bayless has had a ten year affair with a traffic cone with the name “Skip Bayless” written on it in Sharpie. He puts a wig on it, and I have pictures available for the right price. AJ Daulerio, call me!
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