FC Flora Now Retrofitting Entire Team with Nuclear Laser Rocket Legs

You may recall last week’s video of someone named “Vanna” scoring a frightening 35-yard goal for some club called “FC Flora,” all in an unrecognizable, possibly alien tongue.
↵
↵Fortunately, we at TSB have found out more information on the matter. As 101 Great Goals reports, it’s actually Tallinna FC Flora, a minor league club in Estonia, previously best known for being the home country of this guy. The team was involved in Europa League qualifiers, and though they just bowed out, they took one last opportunity to frighten the masses with another ridiculous goal:
↵
↵

↵
↵
↵No, the ball wasn’t struck with the same ridiculous power that Vanna’s goal was, but that’s yet another perfectly-placed, unblockable shot from far outside the penalty box.
↵
↵The implications are clear. They’re all soccer-playing cyborgs, or at the very least all in the process of becoming them. Are you frightened? You should be.
↵
↵Err, that is, perhaps you should once they teach the cyborgs any defense; Brondby won this match 4-1, taking the aggregate win at 4-2 and bouncing FC Flora from the competition. The Soccer Terminators will be back next time, though, and by then they’ll probably be able to form a Voltron and just vaporize their opponents on command. Yes, that’s an automatic red, but you try getting Angry Estonian Soccer Voltron off the pitch. Thought so.↵