Marshawn Lynch Charged With $20 Theft: Somewhere, A Village Is Missing Its Idiot

Crawford, who’s quoted numerous times in the report, is the husband of the woman from whom Lynch allegedly stole $20. He’s also a Seargant in the Buffalo police force. So... Lynch picked the wrong woman to steal from, it seems. Lynch’s legal representation declined to comment, although it’s been reported that Lynch returned the $20 more than a week after the complaint had been filed.

But lest we let the details muddle the picture, here... This has got to be the most ridiculous crime in the history of athlete indiscretions. Like, at least get caught doing something really reckless and cool. Stealing $20 from a helpless woman trying to pay her bar tab? That’s like a crime that they’d come up with in a bad sports movie, for the token “thug athlete” that just aimlessly steals from people and commits acts of idiocy.