New World Cup Ball Described As ‘Terrible’, ‘Weird’ And ‘Frightening Alien Skull’

Adidas witnessed a volley of criticism during the run-up to the 2006 World Cup about the company's "Teamgeist" ball and how its reduced number of panels would create a low spin rate that would bedevil goalkeepers throughout the entire tournament.

Well plus ca change, fellas!

Turns out the new "Jabulani" balls being used in this year's World Cup are drawing some of the same forecasts of doom for all involved. And not only because they bare a striking resemblance to accepted representation of alien life. Seemingly every one interviewed is describing the balls as either cheaply made or prone to erratic flight patterns.

Brazil has been in South Africa since Thursday and Cesar described the World Cup balls as "terrible," comparing them with cheap ones bought in a supermarket. Casillas said the balls were "in an appalling condition."

Field players have been critical too. Brazil striker Luis Fabiano described the ball as "weird" and suddenly changing trajectory and Italy's Giampaolo Pazzini said it was "a disaster."

"It moves so much and makes it difficult to control," the Italian striker said. "You jump up to head a cross and suddenly the ball will move and you miss it."

Adidas is in full-on damage control, claiming that the balls have been in use for months now without complaint and that such concerns are typical as anticipation builds and nerves set in. OR DO THE SENTIENT ALIEN BALLS FORCE THEM TO FEED US LIES!? THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE!