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Come Fan with UsSaturday, June 20, 2026

Stadium porn so great, you’ll want to grow a mustache

PGE Park in Portland: what it will look like if you peeled the roof away
PGE Park in Portland: what it will look like if you peeled the roof away
PGE Park in Portland: what it will look like if you peeled the roof away

I’ve got a piece coming out early this week in SI.com, so I made a round of calls to MLS coaches yesterday. John Spencer was on the list. He’s the new man in charge at Portland, a funny guy who called himself the “fat old Scotsman” the other day. (If he’s fat and old, then the rest of us are massive and pretty much already dead and gone.)

So I was catching up on all matters Portland before I talked to Spencer. He knows me from his days in Houston; I would always say hi when I went to Houston or when the Dynamo came to Dallas, and we always got on well. So, he’d surely have a friendly little go at me if I embarrassed myself by asking a stupid question.

In the course of this mission-critical research, I came across some truly unbelievable stadium porn. (For stadium geeks like me, this kind of “porn” is quite G-rated, I assure you. It just means neat-o pics or animation of facilities. Ooh-la-la!)

PGE Park in downtown Portland is being renovated for the expansion Timbers. Go here to check out the virtual venue, and do prepare to be impressed.

Click onto the seating area (the roof will disappear) and then roll around the seats until one of the field view features pop up. Then drag your mouse around, the view will move as if you are standing up and pivoting from that point.

Oh ... also note the scoreboard. I do believe that it says Portland 4, Seattle Sounders 0. Count that as the next shot fired in a Pacific Northwest rivalry that goes way back to NASL days. Nicely done, ye Timbers. Et tu, Sounders?

I’ve said it before … this place, PGE, is going to rock. MLS will be a better place for Portland’s (and Vancouver’s) inclusion.

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