Terrelle Pryor signed with high-profile agent Drew Rosenhaus today as the former Ohio State quarterback begins his journey toward the NFL supplemental draft.
Applying Drew Rosenhaus’ T.O. quotes to Terrelle Pryor
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It was an appropriate choice for Pryor. Rosenhaus is known best for his association with loudmouth wide receivers Terrell Owens and Chad Ochocinco. It’s fitting since that appears to be Pryor’s best NFL future.
The most perfect union of Pryor and Rosenhaus had me thinking of some of the agent’s famous quotes about Owens. After the jump, see how Rosenhaus can apply those same lines today.
Original quote: “It doesn’t happen overnight. Terrell understands that. But we have a plan and will stick to it. We’re confident that at the end of the day he’ll be happy.”
Expected modern day follow-up: “Yes, he’ll be extremely pleased never playing and probably making less money than he did at THE(!) Ohio State. Sit or start, I still get my percentage of guaranteed money anyway. Next question.”
Original quote: “You can’t look at this in a microscopic way. You’ve got to look at the big picture.”
Expected modern day follow-up: “And the big picture is getting Terrelle Pryor money. What’s that about THE(!) Ohio State? Who cares. That can’t get me, I mean Terrelle, more money. Next question.”
Original quote: “There shouldn’t be a negative reaction to Terrell from the fans. He didn’t miss any practices. He didn’t miss any games.”
Expected modern day follow-up: “But who cares if the only title Terrelle ends up getting Ohio State is the probation championship? Next question.”
Original quote: “Terrell is a great person, and he is here again today to make sure that everyone understands that he is making an apology. People obviously didn’t accept the first one. That’s unfortunate. That’s not Terrell’s fault.”
Expected modern day follow-up: “You’re just an idiot. But wouldn’t you do the same? Haven’t see you seen those sick, duty-free tattoos? After all, one even shows his loyalty to THE(!) Ohio State. For that alone his character should be lauded. Next question.”
Original quote: “There are players in the NFL that are arrested who violate the program when it comes to drugs and substance abuse and they are not punished as severely as him.”
Expected modern day follow-up: “Look, just because THE(!) Ohio State is going to get penalized worse than USC doesn’t make Terrelle Pryor a bad person. Come on, just pity the guy enough so he can score some endorsements (and me some extra money). Next question.”
Now you try. Here’s an applicable quote Rosenhaus had about former Dolphins kicker Olindo Mare:
“It’s embarrassing, that’s what it is, that one of the all-time great players in the history of the franchise is being left to float around like this. This is a deal that should get done in five minutes.”
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