Why not log on to mlb.com and buy him the Baseball’s Lost Innocence Figurine Set? It’s a timeless collection of horrified fans, each representing a different era of increasingly implausible belief in the unimpeachable sterlingness of the national pastime. From the Black Sox scandal, to 1957’s broken Brooklyn Bleacher Bum, to the uptight square reading 1970’s Ball Four, to the modern-day fan watching Roger Clemens in Congress, these figurines “hit for the cycle†of innocence, suspicion, utter cynicism, and then innocence again. And like our faith in the game, the figurines are shatterproof! (Set includes wistful, regret-tinged essay by Bob Costas.)
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