Modern pentathlon is kind of a niche sport. The combination of running, swimming, fencing, shooting and horse jumping used to be played out over five days until Olympic spectators finally stood up and said, “Yeah, we’re good for maybe one day of this, tops.” And right they were! Because one day of modern pentathlon is the exact right number of days. And if you go to just one day of the event, you might see an awesome moment like the one after the jump.
This Horse Does Not Care For Modern Pentathlon
Bill Hanstock is a writer, author and Emmy Award-winning producer. He began writing for SB Nation in 2011.
I mentioned that show jumping is one of the events in the modern pentathlon, but what I neglected to mention is that each athlete is required to ride an unfamiliar horse. So sometimes, you’ll get a horse who totally doesn’t care about the prestige of being in the Olympics (given that horses don’t have any respect for history or national pride, and also because they’re horses). When that happens, a horse may do something like this (Via Deadspin):
“Nope! NOOOOOPE. NopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNopeNope GETOOOOOFFAME whew oh thank god oh man.”
Thank you, horse. Thank you for not understanding pageantry or social cues or language or clothing or how to not have hooves. Clearly, you are the best at modern pentathlon, and I hereby retroactively award you every gold medal, ever. (Note: I do not have the authority to do that. Luckily, you will never read this, for you are a horse.)
For complete coverage of the 2012 London Olympics, visit SB Nation’s Summer Olympics hub.
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