The Blue Jays and Rangers were tied before the seventh inning started. It was a taut, well-played game. Then THE WORLD EXPLODED, and we’re still trying to figure out what happened. A listing ... so far:
Here’s everything that happened in the historically bizarre 7th inning of the Blue Jays-Rangers Game 5
There will never be an inning like this again. Send the whole thing to Cooperstown and bury it.
- With a runner on third and two outs, Blue Jays catcher Russell Martin's return throw to the pitcher hit Rangers batter Shin-Soo Choo's hand. The umpire mistakenly called time, but the runner was still allowed to score. (Click here for a full explanation.)
- Angry Blue Jays fans threw trash onto the field, and someone threw trash that might have hit an infant.
- In the bottom of the inning, the Blue Jays came up and grounded a ball to short. Elvis Andrus booted it.
- The next batter grounded a ball to first, and Andrus couldn't handle a tough, low throw from Mitch Moreland, who picked up the error. Two on, no outs.
- The next batter bunted it to Adrian Beltre, who spun and fired the ball to Andrus covering third ... and Andrus couldn't handle that.
- The next batter chopped the ball to first, and Moreland's throw went to home, and Dalton Pompey slid into home, taking out Rangers catcher Chris Gimenez. The play was reviewed to see if the Rangers should have gotten the extra out at first, too. The play was upheld, and there was still just one out.
- Josh Donaldson, destroyer of worlds, hit a fisted, 80-foot looper just over the head of Rougned Odor at second. One run scored, the game was tied 3-3, and the force play was picked up at second by a throw from Choo.
- Jose Bautista came up and murdered a baseball dead, and now there are no more baseballs because they are all scared and hiding. It was a three-run homer, putting the Blue Jays up, 6-3.
- Because Bautista admired his home run and flipped his bat into space, Rangers people started yelling at Blue Jays people. Then Blue Jays people yelled at Rangers people. Then Rangers people yelled and Blue Jays people yelled and oh god FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
- Benches emptied. No punches were thrown.
- More crap was thrown onto the field.
- Blue Jays pitcher Mark Buehrle was ejected ... even though he isn't on the roster. He was just hanging out.
- Rangers manager Jeff Banister had a fan arrested or something, idk.
- After the inning, humbled and angry Rangers reliever Sam Dyson walked behind Troy Tulowitzki and slapped him on the butt. THE BENCHES EMPTIED AGAIN.
- THE BENCHES EMPTIED BECAUSE ONE BASEBALL PLAYER SLAPPED ANOTHER BASEBALL PLAYER ON THE BUTT.
- THEY DO THAT ALL THE TIME.
The baseball gods are on peyote and throwing flaming furniture off the roof, and there isn’t a damned thing we can do about it.
The inning just ended. You can watch the whole brilliant mess here.
Please send help.
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