March Madness is for NBA snobs too

It’s March, which means it’s again time for gritty, amateur, overachievers to get screamed at by angry millionaire coaches for the entertainment of people who should be working.

But hey, let’s not be NBA snobs. Basketball is a great game, no matter how many restrictive rules are put in place by wealthy bureaucrats. No, Johnny Junior probably can’t make it in The League, but that’s no reason to hate.

Flanns & Zillz try to get with the program.

FLANNERY: Are you filled with Madness? Have you done your bracket? Do you have a favorite corporate champion? There’s no time to waste, Ziller! Those 35-second shot clocks won’t wait forever.

ZILLER: I remember adoring the Tournament as a kid, mostly because I was (and am) a serial planner. Brackets are like porn to serial planners. Then, Joe Smith left Maryland early and I never recovered.

There are attractive things in March Madness to this NBA partisan, but the implementation often leaves me flipping to League Pass. The magic happens and it’s wonderful in the moment, but then there are all of those other moments.

I don’t want to be that NBA fan, so let me show my Madness by saying I love watching the full-court press bother the hell out of point guards. Our friend Ricky O’Donnell tells me VCU runs a nasty press. I can’t wait to see it ruin some Buckeyes.

FLANNERY: I grew up on college basketball, specifically the Big East of the 80s (Send it in, Jerome!). Into the 90s and early 00s, I was much more attuned to the rhythms of the college season than the NBA.

I don’t want to be that NBA guy either, but when I watch the games these days, I get bored by the first (of many) TV timeouts. We all know the list of NBA grievances: The shot clock is way too long, there are too many media timeouts, the zones are ridiculous and the shorter 3-point line takes away space.

But this is where NBA partisans get it wrong and come off like snobs, because people like college basketball for a whole host of reasons that have nothing to do with the game, by and large. So, I’m not trying to do that this year. I’m going to try to appreciate it on its own level and see what happens.

Can we talk about one-and-done?

ZILLER: Let’s talk about one-and-done!

FLANNERY: Has there ever been a rule that has inspired more loathing on either side than one-and-done?

Let’s leave the NBA part of this aside for a minute. The thing I hate the most about the rule is that it’s been allowed to become a red herring for college fans to lay all their problems on this one ill-conceived rule. Like, before one-and-done, college hoops was some basketball Valhalla, full of poets and scholars who all played The Right Way.

ZILLER: That’s a huge annoyance, especially since one-and-done is directly responsible for some of college ball’s most entertaining players and teams in recent years. I hate it because it’s unfair to the players. I understand why coaches who don’t enjoy recruiting stars dislike it: John Calipari has eaten their lunches. And I do sympathize that one-year rentals make for less fully realized programs and sloppier systems in some cases.

But man, Coach K sure figured out how to work it, hasn’t he? You can’t tell me one-and-done is ruining college basketball so long as Duke is still dominant. He’s even changed his recruiting style to get guys like Kyrie Irving, Jabari Parker and Jahlil Okafor. He was destroying most opponents before ‘06 and he’s doing it now. Pay some respect, you hockey pucks.

If not for one-and-done, those batty coaches and grouchy fans would blame some other Other. HOW ABOUT THE 35-SECOND SHOT CLOCK?

FLANNERY: It’s the worst.

ZILLER: Seriously, I do wonder how much dislike of the sport among our kin could be solved with a 24-second college shot clock. I mean, there are unwatchable teams in the NBA despite the shot clock. But the combo of that eternal shot clock plus the defensive schemes and tight quarters due to the shorter arc is a recipe for a whole lot of distinctly baseballish sporting behavior.

Like, the tournament is great entertainment despite the shot clock and the anti-NBA haranguing. Imagine how excellent it’d be without that junk!

FLANNERY: It is great entertainment. The whole notion of win and advance or lose and go home brings a level of chaos and stress that’s impossible to manufacture unless it’s a Game 7. Even that is a whole different beast because you’ve had six games of scouting, scheming and planning. There are no secrets in a Game 7. The tournament is random, especially in the early rounds when one good coaching trick or a suddenly-hot shooter can make all the difference.

Good god, I’m going to start humming One Shining Moment pretty soon.

What’s your favorite tournament moment? Mine is Loyola Marymount and Bo Kimble shooting his first free throws left-handed in honor of Hank Gathers. Gives me chills every time I see it.

ZILLER: I have two: Scotty Thurman, because at age 12 I was a huge Bill Clinton Mark and loved Nolan Richardson’s Hogs. And Princeton over UCLA, because that backdoor cut was the most shocking thing I’d seen in basketball. I considered it wizardry. It holds up.

FLANNERY: My dad is a Princeton grad. Every year we’d go to a game at Jadwin and he’d tell me about playing pickup games with Pete Carrill. (Coach had some sharp elbows, apparently). That game made him so happy, but the one against Georgetown in 89 ... man. I still say Kit Mueller got fouled.

So, I reserve the right to complain about the endless commercials, the overcoaching and the general hypocrisy of a nonprofit entity putting on a billion dollar television spectacular, but we might as well enjoy the games.

ZILLER: Amen.