What’s wrong with you? Stop hating so much. Damn.
Let LeSean McCoy have his orgy
You shamed a man called Shady into not living out his dream. Shame on you.
Kevin Hoffman-USA TODAY Sports
Let Shady have his orgy. Here's one of the best running backs in the league, who was just traded to the Buffalo Bills under acrimonious circumstances. The Buffalo Bills. A team led by Rex Ryan who had, at one time, proclaimed that the Jets would reach the Super Bowl. A team that is quarterbacked by EJ Manuel. Or even worse, Matt Cassel. All Shady wants to do is get away from the stress of being on a team that will inevitably finish with a losing record after being blown out by the Patriots.
Why can’t the man have a nice moonlit evening that starts with a pool party and ends in wild consensual sex with other adults at a private location?
don’t worry world i took a screenshot of the lesean mccoy "only girls invited to my party" instagram pic.twitter.com/ZbqQvrLVgi
— Maxwell Strachan (@maxwellstrachan) July 23, 2015 Are we at the point of shaming professional athletes for satisfying the basic human urge of having an orgy that’s advertised as a celebration? What will become of Dwight Howard, James Harden and Chandler Parsons in this new America? As long as it’s innocent and agreed to by all parties, then who are we to deny Shady the chance to prepare for the rigorous schedule of training camp with a nice and relaxing evening in covert fashion in Philadelphia? For all we know, he could just be trying to gather a crowd big enough to motivate Meek Mill to release a listenable diss track.
Us normal humans who work in offices or from home every day are deprived of the time and energy to even dream about having such a party. The thought itself is a dream within a dream that’s locked in a treasure box that’s stuffed with the stress and routine of everyday life. All we can do is live vicariously through our favorite athletes. When Shady cuts, we cut. When he’s traded, we’re traded and when he’s having to change the criteria for his party after being ousted by the media in hurt fashion, we also hurt.
LeSean McCoy: "... For the record there was no big orgy or anything."
— Mike Rodak (@mikerodak) July 31, 2015
You can practically feel the disappointment through the words. It’s as emotional as Ernest Hemingway’s six word story: For sale: baby shoes, never worn. Reading that, you can just imagine him forcing a smile for the camera, only for his eyes to cast down in gloom right before the interview ends.
He’s going to run through the motions in training camp. You may see him catch a pass out of the backfield before juking several defenders out of their shoes, at which point you will be impressed. The crowd will cheer, the coaches will congratulate him on the resultant touchdown. His teammates will even pat him on the back in a cheerful manner.
But he will jog to the sidelines like a man who was asked if Pepsi was satisfactory instead of Coke. His heart just won’t be in it anymore. His mind will still be on the unfulfilled potential of that long-lost night of flesh-on-flesh action in a secluded locale in Philadelphia. He may even fall into a season-long funk when he realizes that he’s also a member of the Buffalo Bills.
No human should have to deal with such a loss and burden of playing running back for a sub-par AFC East team. Willis McGahee once described going to Buffalo as "hitting a brick wall," stating that when he was on the Bills all he did was go home and play video games. And on one hand, we can say that was good because it kept him out of trouble. But on the other hand, nah.
It's probably good that the situation was defused before the party actually went on. So many problems could arise from such a situation. There's a big chance that Eagles fans would have found the place and bombarded those involved with a hail of tomatoes. If they attacked Santa, no human is off limits.
Regardless. A super-rich athlete should have the right to plan a random night of boisterous activities with numerous consenting partners without being publicly shamed for it. The abundance of cash and free time in the offseason almost demands such things. Additionally, the fact that in this case, the athlete in question has to play in Buffalo makes the situation one of a sympathetic nature. Let the man romp around. Let Shady have his orgy.
SB Nation presents: How LeSean McCoy reached NFL stardom
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