Nick Young conducts an interview as Kobe Bryant

Lakers reporters hoped they’d get to speak to the rehabilitating Kobe Bryant on Friday. Instead, they got Nick Young sitting at Kobe Bryant’s locker and pretending to be Kobe Bryant, which is WAY BETTER. Dave McMenamin has the transcript of the above-linked video, the highlights of which are here:

1.

Reporter 1: “Do you feel like you’re the greatest of all time?”

Swaggy Mamba: “Yeah, of course. I did so much in this game. You know, 30,000-some points. On my way to 31 (thousand). Five rings. Um ... Yeah. Eighteen years. Um, I’m the greatest. What can I say?”

Swaggy P’s got a remarkably accurate idea of Kobe’s career numbers (although he’s already over 31,000 points).

2.

Reporter 2: “Kobe, what do you think of Nick Young?”

Nick Bryant: “Um, he has a lot of potential. Just, I’ll work with him. He’ll be one of the great ones after I’m done.”

Just me, or does Swaggy Mamba seem like he’s holding back some criticism of Swaggy P?

3.

Reporter 1: “Kobe, does it hurt your fractured knee when I hit it?”

Kobe P: “The Mamba ... I slither through things. You know, I really don’t have bones. What else can I say?”

Snakes have bones.