Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about The Rock’s legs?
The Rock’s legs are so big they have their own legs


That Instagram post has a nice description of the character Mr. Rock will play in his next film, but I forgot how to read because my eyes have just seen a man standing upon columns of knotted tree roots covered in human flesh. You can’t achieve this lower body physique with normal weight training. Having conquered the maximum leg press, The Rock now strangles rhinoceroses to add mass and tone.
I think his thighs have fists, or legs of their own. Like, if he were to flex a quad in the right position, it could hit you in the face and knock you out. Maybe those are the buds of new musclemen, sprouting from The Rock’s body to one day separate and live muscly lives of their own.
Good job, The Rock. The only way I could get my legs to look like this is if I smuggled loaves of challah under my skin.
★★★
Chuck Norris explains the finer points of hand-to-hand combat and remembers the time when Bruce Lee wanted to kill him.

