1. If you’ve ever seen Cam Newton’s Instagram, you know he has a distinctive captioning style in which he converts almost every English letter into some visually similar character such that it becomes a string of spammy-looking “text” that looks halfway between a ransom note and Webdings, yet still readable if you stare hard enough.
Here is what ‘A Tale Of Two Cities’ would look like if Cam Newton wrote it
2. Ever the businessman, Cam is capitalizing on his idiosyncratic writing style with an app. The app puts a new keyboard on your phone that allows you to systematically transpose any character on a normal keyboard with any other character, or you can just plop in some text and the app will garble it Cam-style for you.
I bought it. It was a dollar. Don’t buy it.
3. Here is what the opening line of Charles Dickens’ A Tale Of Two Cities looks like, as re-imagined by Cam Newton’s app:
”>įtWÅ$thëßË$TöfT1MË$,įtWÅ$thë
WØR$TöfT1MË$,įtWÅ$thëÅGËöfW1$DØM,
įtWÅ$thëÅGËöfFØØŁ1$HNË$,įtWÅ$thë
Ë₽Ø€HöfßËŁ1ËF,įtWÅ$thëË₽Ø€Höf
1N€RËDŪŁ1TŸ,įtWÅ$thë$ËÅ$ØNöfŁ1GHT,
įtWÅ$thë$ËÅ$ØNöfDÅRKNË$,įtWÅ$thë
$₽R1NGöfHØ₽Ë,įtWÅ$thëW1NTËRöf
DË$₽Å1R,wëHÅDëvërÿthįñgßËFØRËüs,WË
hâdNØTH1NGbëförëŪ$,wëWËRËâllGØ1NG
dįrëctTØhëâvëñ,WËwërëÅŁŁgöįñg
D1RË€TthëØTHËRwâÿ-įñ$HØRT,thë
₽ËR1ØDwâs$ØfârŁ1KËthë₽RË$ËNT
përįöd,THÅTsömëØFįtsNØ1$1Ë$T
âüthörįtįës1N$1$TËDöñ1T$bëįñg
RË€Ë1VËD,förGØØDörFØRëvįl,1Nthë
$Ū₽ËRŁÅT1VËdëgrëëØFcömpârįsöñØNŁŸ.
I mean, it’s a mess, but I probably would have enjoyed ninth grade English more if we read that instead.
