What’s the best ocean? I often wonder this. You might contend that an ocean is too vast, too varied for any person to appraise in full, let alone compare to other whole oceans. To you I say:
Google Maps lets you review oceans and continents
Yes. I’ve just learned (all thanks to @interrobango) that Google Maps lets people leave reviews on oceans. Continents can be reviewed, too:
What are these reviews like? Well, most people are joking. Some seem to be earnest. Some have found yet another spot to pollute with racism. Some people are just typing letters into the internet.
Every ocean has reviews. So does every continent.
As far as I can tell, Google doesn’t let you review Earth as a whole, nor any of its hemispheres. On the other hand, you can review tiny uninhabited Antarctic islands:
I’ve never been to Sturge Island, but it does look nice. Vox Media, if you want to expense the trips, I will happily visit all the unreviewed islands on Google Maps and produce comprehensive critiques of each.
So anyway, what’s the best ocean? Google doesn’t provide a mean rating, and there are too many reviews for me to justifiably average them by hand while someone is paying me to work, so I just counted up all the five-star reviews as a percentage of total reviews of each ocean, because honestly, if your experience with an unfathomably expansive body of water essential to all life on Earth didn’t merit 5 stars, were you really satisfied?
Atlantic: 176 five-star reviews out of 332 total = 53% Ocean Satisfaction
Pacific: 210/415 = 51% Ocean Satisfaction
Indian: 128/234 = 55% Ocean Satisfaction
Arctic: 63/145 = 45% Ocean Satisfaction
The best ocean is the Indian Ocean. The Arctic Ocean sucks. Here is an example of how much 5-star reviewers love the Indian Ocean:
Thank you for reading.
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