Marshall Henderson suspension: Ole Miss suspends star for failed drug test

If only because of his continued insistence that it is in fact the case, we might as well consider the possibility that recently suspended Ole Miss chucker-in-chief Marshall Henderson actually is an idiot. Let’s concede, true or not, that Henderson’s impulse control is nil and his decision-making skills effectively negligible on his best day, and that he drinks and takes drugs in unwise ways. In short: let’s concede that he acts like an idiotic parody of himself during every moment that he’s awake, and that he’s probably even worse in his dreams. (Because he can fly in those.)

This is the same thing as saying that Marshall Henderson is more or less in the middle 80 percent of college-age American humans. But let’s further stipulate that Marshall Henderson shouldn’t be that way. He should be different than that, better than that. Shave that unfortunate smudgy bro-goatee. Get his diction and grammar up, ease back on the #hashtag #abuse. Eat a healthy diet and get enough sleep, and stop smoking dope and drinking. These are all good ideas, actually, and things we might all do well to work towards ourselves. (At least start with the goatee, if that applies to you. What are you, a member of the 1997 Atlanta Braves bullpen?)

Marshall was suspended earlier Wednesday for violating team rules, which ended up being a failed drug test. It isn’t Henderson’s first run-in with drugs either, as he tested positive for cocaine, marijuana and alcohol while on probation for a previous crime.

After Marshall had cemented himself in the collective consciousness of college hoops viewers, Ole Miss coach Andy Kennedy said in a statement he had hoped Marshall would take on a greater leadership role with the team. Whether or not he even has a role with the team next year is now up in the air.