5 new bowl game sponsors for 2017, ranked by weirdness

College football has an interesting relationship with brands. It manifests itself in the postseason with what is a wild west that is bowl naming rights. The Rose Bowl’s sponsored by Northwestern Mutual, and the Heart of Dallas Bowl is sponsored by Zaxby’s. Only in the this sport could we have two events with such disparate corporate ties under the same tent.

But every year, a few games turn our heads with new sponsorship agreements. This year, there are five.

Popeye’s is no longer sponsoring the Bahamas Bowl, and it’s just as disappointing as it is when they’re out of spicy. The game’s continuing with no sponsorship attached.

It is a crushing blow to those who revere the culinary institution and its three-year run as sponsor of a bowl game in one of the most unlikely places. No longer will the fryers be imported to dunk the chicken. No longer will KFC have fierce brand competition on the island. RIP Popeye’s Bahamas Bowl, a name gone too soon.

Now, for sponsors that are joining us.

This was the only company on the list that I honestly had to Google. I had absolutely no idea what Overton’s is, and my best guess was another restaurant. I was very incorrect; it’s a sporting goods company, according to the internet (which is never wrong).

The Independence Bowl has had an interesting sponsorship path, including Duck Commander, weed eaters, AdvoCare, and more. But now a Baton Rouge restaurant named Walk-On’s has the rights.

The restaurant is very Louisiana:

Walk-On’s is basically what you get if Buffalo Wild Wings and Louisiana Cajun cuisine had a baby. There’s one right down the street from Tiger Stadium in Baton Rouge, New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees is an investor, and the restaurant is LSU through and through.

And while the grammatical structure of the name might bother you, it comes from the fact that two former LSU walk-on basketball players decided their talents were better served in the kitchen. All in all, not that strange for a restaurant to sponsor a bowl.

I appreciate the Frisco Bowl’s pivot. The bowl used to be played in Miami Beach and was about fun in the sun and tanned slender bodies. Now it’s in Texas and sponsored by a company called Destination XL. It’s made to serve husky gentlemen, and the game is being played in a state famous for barbecue.

As a husky gentleman myself, I approve. Much more appropriate for a sport with 300-pound linemen. Perhaps they’re trying to corner that market of football fans? It’s an aggressive brand play for a clothing retailer to hook up with a bowl. Watch out, Belk Bowl.

The artist formerly known as the Beef ‘O’ Brady’s Bowl and Bitcoin Bowl has another strange name. This time a mowing company that insists it’s badass. The company markets itself as selling “mowers with attitude.” Here’s a look at the product:

You should get used to the look, because Brett Dulaney, executive director of the Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl, told SB Nation’s Morgan Moriarty there will be mowers basically everywhere during the game.

“At the stadium itself, there are going to be mowers everywhere, all over the place,” Dulaney said. “People handing out information, promotional teams, we’ll have mowers out on the field — we’ll probably have a mower bring out the stage for the trophy presentation. So we’ll have lawnmowers up on the concourses, out on the field, they’ll be in television view, we’ll have them on our shipwreck party deck, but we’ll also have them at all of our other events.”

It’ll be weird, but we did have the Poulan Weed Eater Bowl a few years back.

(The Gasparilla part refers to a Tampa area festival named after a legendary pirate.)

When I think cherry juice, I think either Cherry Coke or that weird goop that comes in the bottle of maraschino cherries. What I don’t think of is fresh-squeezed cherry juice.

Apparently the stuff is very healthy, per the company’s website.

Word is spreading about tart cherries and their restorative powers. Did you know that tart cherry juice could help with faster muscle recovery, trouble sleeping, and increased stamina? Anthocyanins are what give tart cherries their beautiful deep red color and are also credited with providing powerful health benefits.

ESPN’s Trey Wingo extolled its virtues:

Here is one the cutest babies I have ever seen enjoying the juice as well:

If it’s good enough for that little dude, then I guess it’s good enough for me. But tart cherry juice is weird, just like playing a game in a glorified retirement community is weird.