Tiger Woods exposes hairy gams as golf clothier pleads: Let ‘em wear shorts

Tiger Woods, in a happy coincidence, displays his shapely wheels in a promo for the new Nike golf shoes he wore on his way to winning The Players Championship on the same day that Ashworth launched an online campaign to let PGA Tour players wear shorts.

We’ll have to wait for “more info” on Tiger’s TPC-winning slippers but you can sign up now to boost Ashworth’s pitch to free Justin Rose, Justin Leonard, Johnson Wagner, Retief Goosen, and Sean O’Hair from the painful constraints of long pants.

In a playful slam of golf’s logic-defying traditions and the tour’s unfathomable regulations -- specifically, the mandate that members must cover their legs during official competition -- the Ashworth Five make a pretty compelling case for taking scissors to the cloth right above the knee.

“Women can wear shorts but we can’t?” wonders Wagner. “That’s got a name; it’s called reverse sexism.”

“Birthday suits don’t have pants; it’s unnatural,” observes Goosen.

“Think of ‘em as tiny trousers,” Rose suggests.

Leonard offers the best reason of all to let the guys proudly flaunt their hairy walking sticks: “It’s. Just. So. Hot.”