WE DID IT BROOKLYN. After nine months at Rikers Island, Lil Wayne is finally free. It took a little longer than expected, but it’s official.
Weezy Friday: Lil Wayne Is Free At Last, And It’s Time To Celebrate
And this will be the last Weezy Friday for a while. Not ever, because he could always go back to jail. But for a little while, anyway. There’s no need to bombard you with reminders of Wayne’s awesomeness now that he’s back to his reguarly schedule of recording and releasing music 24/7, smoking more weed than you thought possible, and charming the likes of Katie Couric and Bill Clinton.
But because it’s a celebration, we couldn’t just let this day pass without some special considerations. Click here for a look at why Lil Wayne’s the best rapper alive, and click here for every Weezy Friday we’ve done, all in one place. And now, one last celebration of gratuitous sports metaphors!
1. “I’m a keep that s*** runnin like I’m Marshall Faulk stuntin on a Sunday, I’m Devin Hester and you don’t wanna punt it” -- Big Spender
2. “Blitz yo ass like a mothaf***in lineman, sackin paychecks with a whole bunch of commas, still wear red like an old 49ers” -- Freestyle
3. “I’d run this s**t but I’d tackle it. You want me to break it down? I’m a fracture it.” -- Forgot About Me
4. “You better call every pall-bearier in yall area, the ball carrier gon’ get POPPED if I’m coming ‘round the block, the ensuing drive get stopped. He gon’ drop like a flop on the court, I love sports, that’s why I play my b****es.” -- Da Art Of Storytellin
Popped:
Stopped:
Flop:
5. “Listen close I got duct tape and rope, I leave you missin like the f***in O’Bannons” - Cannon
...And that’s where we end. Because that line was the first time I started taking Lil Wayne seriously. Like, “Did he really just shout out the O’Bannon brothers? I might have to start listening to this dude.”
And a few years later, I think I compared to him Jimi Hendrix or something.
Pop bottles this weekend, and if you can get your hands on some promethazine, remember: it’s best mixed with Sprite, and only to be consumed from styrofoam cups. LONG LIVE WEEZY.
(All photos via Getty Images ... T-shirt via)
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