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Come Fan with UsSaturday, July 4, 2026

Rob Gronkowski doesn’t understand the concept of time machines

I mean, time machines don’t exist, but if they did... this isn’t how they would work.

Jared Wickerham

Apparently, there is a show called the “Toucher and Rich” show in Boston. Wow, that show needs a new name! But regardless, we found out an incredibly magical interaction featuring Rob Gronkowski via their Twitter. Somebody asked Rob Gronkowski the typical boring question asked of athletes -- what super power would you want -- and he took it away:

a) "A time machine" is not a super power. It's a time machine. The ability to travel back and forth through time would be a super power. A time machine is a machine that has that power.

B) TIME MACHINES DON’T TAKE YOU FROM PLACE TO PLACE. THEY TAKE YOU THROUGH TIME. Some depictions of time machines (such as those in Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure) seem to have the capability to bring people to various places in various time periods, but that doesn’t seem to be what Gronk is referring to. He seems to mean teleportation.

If only somebody had given Lana Berry a time machine so she could have gone BOOM FLORIDA and not been at Rob Gronkowski’s football camp...

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