Please stop painting your face like a baseball
You’re super excited it’s baseball season. We get it. Now stop.
James Dator has been covering a wide range of sports for SB Nation for over a decade, with a special focus on the NFL.
Baseball season is upon us. You all know what that means. This is the horrifying time of year when children who don’t brush their teeth are kidnapped from their beds by Seamhead, who takes them to the land of sorrow to turn their skin into baseballs.
It’s unclear where this tradition of “paint your head like a baseball” started. It’s probably on some message board for bald men found on a Tor hidden site. This needs to stop, like, right now. It’s horrifying, not okay and probably infringing on some Hellraiser copyright.
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