Last year, the Hallmark Channel aired the Kitten Bowl for the first time as counterprogramming for Animal Planet’s wildly successful Puppy Bowl, which in turn is counterprogramming for the Super Bowl, which is some dumb sports thing.
The people behind the Kitten Bowl are launching the ‘Feline Football League’
An entire kitten football league will add long-needed legitimacy to the Kitten Bowl. (But mainly just provide us with more videos of kittens playing.)
Morne de Klerk
Well, apparently people liked it, because in addition to a Kitten All-Star Game (counterprogramming for the 2015 MLB All-Star Game) the network is launching the “Feline Football League,“ which will apparently be several games of kittens pretending to play football leading up to the Kitten Bowl.
The kittens will participate in season games for the chance to claw their way to the end zone in the 2nd annual classic, Kitten Bowl II, premiering Su-purr Bowl Sunday 2015. Beginning this November, an FFL Scouting Combine will search for the most competitive, adorable and adoptable feline players before holding an exciting kitten draft. Once the draft has been announced, kittens will be placed into teams of their own colors, logos and mascots where viewers can follow regular season game highlights across Hallmark Channel's digital and social networks - all leading up to the broadcast of the feline football championship,Kitten Bowl II.
Listen, we’re in full support of this. Sure, this started out with tiny animals running around while somebody narrates the action as if it was a sport, but then it turned into REAL SPORTS, which is why there was Fantasy Puppy Bowl last year. However, not having seen an entire season of Puppy Football, we had to pick based on our previous ideas of what certain dog breeds would bring on the puppy field, which was a horrible mistake. Our fantasy Puppy Bowl team did horribly, and we’re still living with the shame.
The Feline Football League solves this problem: after following kitten football all year long, we’ll finally be able to understand the storylines and strategies of the Big Kitten Game, which is all us Cat Sports fans have been asking for.
(Oh, also, this means there’ll be more video of kittens. Kittens playing. Cute, adoptable kittens, playing. Nothing else actually matters. Just give us baby animal videos. Don’t have any programming on your channel besides baby animals and we will watch your channel way more than we did before.)
