You know how some people are called “horse whisperers?” In Russia, they have something like that, but ducks instead of horses. And yelling instead of whispering. But it WORKS. Look how well it works! Just remember: the next time you need a bunch of ducks to all go to a place, just unbutton your shirt and start yelling in Russian. Based on the available evidence, it works 100 percent of the time.
Bare-chested Russian man shouts ducks into his barn
How do you solve a problem like a herd of ducks? YELL.
Bill Hanstock is a writer, author and Emmy Award-winning producer. He began writing for SB Nation in 2011.
