This is supposed to be a story about Diamondbacks bullpen catcher Jeff Motuzas. It's a story about how Motuzas will eat just about anything, and allow just about anything to be done to him, all in the name of making some money and keeping things loose. Regurgitated yogurt on a potato chip? Habanero peppers? Three-day-old tobacco spit and chili? If you can dream it, and if you can afford it, Jeff Motuzas will let it be done to his body.
Story About Diamondbacks Bullpen Catcher Says More About Awful Person Livan Hernandez
But while Motuzas is most definitely a story worth covering - especially at this point in the year - I'm afraid it's someone else entirely who, at least to me, manages to steal the spotlight. I'm referring, of course, to Livan Hernandez.
The following is a list of things Hernandez has paid Motuzas to do:
-drink a gallon of milk in 12 minutes
-take a punch in the balls whenever Hernandez felt like it
-get blindfolded by Hernandez and beaten with nunchuks
Motuzas laughs it all off, saying, That was just his thing. Great guy, though. But one of those things is cruel and the other two are dangerous physical escalations, hinting at the existence of an internal dark passenger. Livan Hernandez doesn’t pitch for the Diamondbacks anymore and no longer interacts with Motuzas, and that’s good because eventually Hernandez would have killed him.
The 36-year-old Hernandez is the nominal ace of the Nationals this season, and he's been able to find consistent employment in large part because he provides proven veteran leadership. With the release of this story, though, one can't help but wonder if Hernandez might not be the best example for younger players to follow, because Livan Hernandez may well be a murderer who hasn't murdered yet. Look to the precogs.
See More:
