World Series Game 1: Red Sox 8, Dodgers 4

BOSTON — A huge banner on the side of Fenway Park during the 2018 World Series proclaims it to be “AMERICA’S MOST BELOVED BALLPARK,” which is a bold claim. There are folks in Chicago who would violently quibble with the designation. But what we do know for sure that Fenway is America’s funniest ballpark. It’s funny like an old man with his pants pulled up to his midsection, and we don’t talk enough about how silly it is.

For starters, Fenway is almost hidden from the outside, blending into the city blocks around it, as if it were built surreptitiously in a time when baseball was illegal. The inside of the park makes it all seem like a structure from the Game of Thrones intro that stopped expanding two-thirds of the way through. It’s all small and compacted, with overhangs and nooks and trapezoids and crannies and triangles everywhere. There’s a giant wall here and a tiny wall there, both of which affect the play dramatically. It’s a beautiful, silly place, and it’s hard to believe it still exists.

The excellent pitching duel we expected in Game 1 of the World Series didn’t fully materialize on Tuesday night at Fenway Park, with neither Clayton Kershaw nor Chris Sale able to record an out in the fifth inning. The contest became a battle of the bullpens, won by the Red Sox in a landslide 8-4 over the Dodgers.

The Dodgers bullpen allowed just six runs in 41⅔ innings in the first two rounds of the playoffs for a 1.30 ERA, but allowed three runs in four innings on Tuesday, and allowed two inherited runs to score after Kershaw was pulled.

Each year for the past 11 seasons, Taco Bell has run a promotion that gives America free tacos if a member of either team playing in the World Series steals a base during any of the seven games. Red Sox star Mookie Betts gave the country free tacos as soon as he possibly could.

Betts, leading off for the Red Sox, singled into center and successfully stole second shortly after thanks to an off-the-mark throw from Dodgers catcher Austin Barnes. First batter for the home team, free tacos secured. The only reason we didn’t get confirmation of free tacos earlier is because the Dodgers lineup couldn’t get anything going in the first inning against Chris Sale.