Mound Visits: Alexander Ovechkin drunk with the Stanley Cup at a Nationals game is pure joy

Welcome to Mound Visits, your weekly recap of the best things you might have missed in baseball every week. This week brings us the most painful catch ever, Alex Ovechkin’s Stanley Cup tour going to Nationals Park, and a Baltimore bar just trying to get everyone through this Orioles season together.

Have a favorite Mound Visit? Tweet it at me, and I’ll include it in next week’s column.

Everyone has seen this by now. It’s almost a week old and has definitely made the rounds. But I do think we need to acknowledge that there is now something in the sport of baseball commonly be referred to as the “scissoring catch” and everyone knows what that is. Could any other team have given us this moment besides the Rays? Probably not.

The aftermath looked like closer to the aftermath of a car accident than a baseball play.

Based on this mid-play facial expression, that’s probably closer to correct than I’m completely comfortable thinking about. These poor guys.

This is the better part of baseball. The hugging part. The part without two players possibly damaging each other’s ability to have children in the future. Just two Minnesota teens hugging it out. These teens will save us all. Or at least make us feel better about society while everything falls apart.

Florida Gators baseball, the defending College World Series champions, almost failed to make it back to the CWS at all in a tight game with Auburn. It turned out the difference-making run in their 3-2 eventual win came when a Florida player stole home with two outs in a tie game.

That’s some courage right there. Thank goodness he was safe because otherwise ... woof.

Brewers pitcher Matt Albers went on the 10-day DL with a shoulder injury this week, but not before he managed to hit the batter, the catcher, and the ump all in one pitch. Three annoyed people in one toss — that’s got to be a new record.

Elsewhere in the world of Brewers-Cubs games, Milwaukee either managed to excellently dupe the Cubs with their base running strategy, or the Cubs completely failed to remember how exactly rundowns work.

Lorenzo Cain had a very smart strategy here specifically meant to confuse the other team ... but I’m still erring on the side of the Cubs botching this terribly. They literally forgot to complete the tagging part of the rundown in time, spacing out about where the base was and tagging Christian Yelich after he had already reached the bag. Just a disaster.

The original viral Pizza Rat moment happened in 2015. As in three years ago, 2015. As in there have been multiple minor league baseball seasons since that news cycle and now. Yet the Staten Island Yankees are just getting around to making a fun, promotional name change now that references the infamous rat.

We’ll give them a pass on this one because if you live in New York you know that Pizza Rat was just one of many similar subway rodents, and that he lives on in every rat with food you see on the D train tracks on your Monday morning commute.

Alex Ovechkin’s tour through D.C. took him many places, including doing snow angels in a fountain. He was pretty much drunk the whole time (or at least he seemed it, so the legal department won’t come after me) which is extremely admirable and jealousy-inducing.

Part of that tour brought him to Nationals Park where he ... well, let’s go to the tape.

He’s perfect. He’s a gem of a human. He is everyone who has ever imagined winning the Stanley Cup and then drinking for four straight days while carrying a 35-pound trophy around. I hope he never, ever changes.

Get it? Worth a shot? Because a Baltimore bar is offering people shots for every Chris Davis hit the rest of this season? Listen, we’re in the home stretch of this column and every pun can’t be the funniest thing in the world. Here’s a ridiculous picture of Chris Davis to make up for it.

Don’t believe me? Put the Footloose song on. Or sing it to yourself, because I know you know it. Filia got traded to the Red Sox this week, and what better way for the Mariners to say goodbye to a decent prospect than playing “Footloose” and dancing with this GIF. Kick off your Sunday shoes.

This is one of those situations where we know the general goings on — lots of profanity, some yelling, general respect between both sides even as one guy is about to get ejected — but being able to actually hear it is incredible.

MLB wants this video scrubbed from the internet (due to some entirely fair umpire CBA clauses), but it’s back up on YouTube for the time being so you can experience it in all its glory.

It also comes with the perfect chaser.

Terry Collins can be so great.

Ding! Ping! [Rattles around near short for a while and racks up some bonus points.] And that’s an out!