I have tragic news for you all. If you made it this far you know that something tragic has happened on the face of one Bryce Harper, star of the Washington Nationals and before today a bearded man.
BRYCE HARPER SHAVED
The beard is gone. Mourn accordingly.
Nick Turchiaro-USA TODAY Sports
According to reports from the field, Harper is no longer bearded. He has shaved. The luscious, full face of hair that we have grown to love is gone. Taken from us in an instant after it took so long to grow and mature into the special beard that it was.
There are multiple people confirming this downer of a story today, so while we may holdout hope something got lost in translation this doesn’t seem to be a reporting mistake.
There’s no word on whether Harper went for a stubble look or if his face is smooth as the wood of a baseball bat freshly polished and ready for a summer afternoon game. But anything short of that garden of hair on his face will be tough to get used to. It’s a loss in the baseball family, and the summer just won’t be the same.
Did he get too hot? Is this his preparation to be in Yankees’ pinstripes next season? The Nationals are playing the Yankees today. Did he lose a bet with a teammate? If it’s the last one then we absolutely need someone to leak who is to blame and what the bet was so we can judge that friend forever for doing this to us.
We’ll mourn this day together, baseball friends. And casually knock over some Gillette displays at the store tomorrow in retaliation.
Update: Here is photo evidence of the facial hair massacre. Continuing your mourning as you were.
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