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Come Fan with UsTuesday, August 4, 2026

The Schrödinger’s Cat NBA All-Stars

This may sound weird, but these players are both the hottest and coldest in the NBA.

Schrödinger’s cat refers to an experiment in thought in which a cat is sealed in a box with a source of radioactivity and a bottle of poison. The poison is released if any radioactivity is detected. As such, to the outside observer, the cat’s fate is unknown. In essence, the cat is both dead and alive.

During the Knicks vs. Pacers game last night, I couldn't help but notice that J.R. Smith is the NBA player version of Schrödinger's cat, simultaneously red hot and ice cold. He was hitting insane shots and pretty much singlehandedly keeping New York from falling behind in the third quarter. Smith got to the rim with a fervor, throwing down a thunderous jam, laying in incredible circus shots. But then as suddenly as he got hot, he went dead, missing six consecutive shots.

Inspired by his performance, I wondered who else is as simultaneously hot and cold. So here are your Schrödinger’s Cat All-Stars.

Gordon's not nearly as effective as he was back in the Chicago days, but he still has the ability to catch fire. With his decline, he unfortunately also has the capacity to make the Bobcats even worse, which is really impressive considering how bad they are.

The swaggiest player in the NBA is also one of the most unpredictable. He’s had more than his handful of 20- and 30-point games. He also has about as many games with fewer than five points.

The man drained a three pointer in a game and barely hits more than 50% of his free throws. It’s possible you could see an amazing athletic feat that’ll make you wonder how he isn’t dominating. But it’s also just as likely to see him make a play that makes James Naismith spin in his grave.

Come on, had to be done. I’m not sure anyone else is capable of getting hotter than Kobe. But he’s also very likely to taking too many shots no one has business taking. I mean, AND his team hasn’t won in 2013.

Anyone we missed? Let us know in the comments!

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