Skip to main content
Come Fan with UsTuesday, August 4, 2026

The Great Knicks-Nets Crap-Off Rap-Off diss track

If you’re looking for a bad rap song to commemorate a bad basketball game between the Knicks and Nets, look no further

Debby Wong-USA TODAY Sports

To celebrate the magnificent nationally televised battle between the 3-13 New York Knicks and the 5-13 Brooklyn Nets tonight, I threw together a short terrible rap about how they both suck. The lyrics are below.

Wassup to Brooklyn: all the scenesters and pretentious cuisiners
the over-caffeiners, oh and all the Nets with broken femurs

I’m meaner, obscener than Prospect Park’s latrine cleaners’ demeanors
Check the stats, are we sure Kevin and Jason don’t have broken fingers?

Half your team’s out of action in traction
And Jason’s firing Frank as a welcome distraction

And you’re ugly and you stink worse than the Gowanus
Might as well start Tornike, cuz regardless you’re goners

Even if you’re doing your job right, Dolan will have you laid off
I’m not sure there’s any difference between him and Bernie Madoff

Both shittin ya and taking ya cash oh with such ease
Puttin holes in your bank account like it’s swiss cheese

Now Bernie’s convicted just staring at his own navel in prison
While Dolan gets lip service on his own Cablevision

This team’s going to make for one hell of a blues song, there’s no way it may not
But if James Dolan stops the dancers, fans will want JD straight shot

More from SB Nation NBA:

The Hook: How to eliminate intentional fouls from the NBA

Deeks: When should NBA teams pay the luxury tax?

Ziller: Where the new Nowitzkis fall on the stretch four spectrum

NBA Power Rankings: Streaking Heat not yet No. 1

How the Heat avoid a championship hangover

See More:

More in NBA

NBA
NBA free agent predictions for biggest names still availableNBA free agent predictions for biggest names still available
NBA

Let’s predict the landing spots for the NBA’s top remaining free agents.

By Ricky O'Donnell
NBA
7 NBA teams who will be way better than last year7 NBA teams who will be way better than last year
NBA

These NBA teams are going to be a lot better in the upcoming season than they were last year.

By Ricky O'Donnell
NBA
Why LeBron James chose the 76ers in NBA free agency, and his big bet on Jaylen BrownWhy LeBron James chose the 76ers in NBA free agency, and his big bet on Jaylen Brown
NBA

LeBron James *really* wanted to play with Jaylen Brown

By Ricky O'Donnell
NBA
NBA Reacts: Are the LeBron Sixers the best team in the East?NBA Reacts: Are the LeBron Sixers the best team in the East?
NBA

The 76ers have more talent than anyone in the Eastern Conference, but will it turn into enough wins to win the East?

By Kyle Thele
NBA
Steph Curry to the Hornets is the wild NBA rumor that might have legsSteph Curry to the Hornets is the wild NBA rumor that might have legs
NBA

This makes so much sense, and it’s so irresponsible.

By James Dator