Good morning. The Hawks could not be more real.

Good morning. Let’s ...

... what’s that? Steve Ballmer is dancing to Fergie courtside at Lakers-Clippers? He’s dancing exactly how you’d expect Steve Ballmer to dance? Well, uh, thank you. Thank you for that alert. Now, as I was saying, let’s bas ... my goodness, what is he doing? Is he ... is he having a seizure? Is he being attacked by invisible bees? Did he have a fever dream? I think we should call a medic. Medic! ... Oh, he stopped. He seems to be sweating profusely and ... smiling. That ... that was intentional? Oh. Oh. That’s haunting, frankly.

Uhh, let’s basketball, I guess.

HEY MOP MAN: Ballmer wasn’t the only bro to get down to Fergie.

RECORD SCRATCH: The Drive & Kick Podcast is back! Paul Flannery talks to Scott Cacciola of the New York Times about where the Knicks go from here.

EVEN THE HAWKS! So Atlanta beat the Grizzlies convincingly enough, moving to 27-8, which is tied for the second best record in the entire NBA. The Hawks have opened up a 2.5-game lead in the East. The entire Atlanta metropolitan area cannot feel its face right now. (Mostly because it’s like 9 degrees or so. But also because of the Hawks.)

ALSO: SCENES FROM SWIPE RIGHT NIGHT! Read to the end for impossibly good trolling from the Nets.

ALSO THE PISTONS: Detroit just swept San Antonio and Dallas on a road back-to-back. ... WHAT?? The Pistons are 7-0 since waiving Josh Smith. Stan Van Gundy is making a late push for Executive of the Year on the basis of a rather rash financial move. It’s amazing.

CURSE OF DION: The Thunder are 0-2 since trading for Dion Waiters. He was 1-9 in his debut, a drubbing at the hands of ... Sacramento. Russell Westbrook landed one spectacular dunk and like two other FGs total in 19 attempts. He is slumping hard, and the Thunder are four games out of the No. 8 thanks to ...

THE SUNS HANG AROUND: Phoenix won another close one, this time over Minnesota due to a missed Andrew Wiggins game-winner attempt, but not without cost: Marcus Morris lost his s--t in the huddle and screamed at Jeff Hornacek. NOT GOOD.

SPEAKING OF THE WOLVES ... Shabazz Muhammed picked up an assist off of an airballed dunk. That’s real amazing.

KEMBA! AGAIN! Kemba Walker hit another game-winner. Charlotte has quietly won three straight. New Orleans falls under .500.

WOW: Carmelo Anthony is getting paid all that money to watch Cole Aldrich shoot hook shots off of the back of the backboard, which doesn’t even sound possible but is because KNICKS.

UHHH: The Bulls lost by 20 ... at home ... to the Jazz.

DO YOU BLAME THEM? The Lakers are in the middle of a lost season. Already by the second quarter, they were in a lost game against the Clippers. So when Blake Griffin started charging up his finishing move, no Lakers elected to volunteer to guard the middle of the floor. Not one of them. They let him take it, and take it he did, with an in-game dunk that might contend at a dunk contest. Do you blame them? I do not.

THE J.R. ERA BEGINS: The Cavs got smoked by the Rockets. Buuuuut J.R. Smith had a few excellent quotes and shot 0-5, so ... success?

WE HAVE A TRADE: Help is on the way as Cleveland is trading two protected firsts for Timofey Mozgov. Is Denver conceding the season? Arron Afflalo and Wilson Chandler are the obvious next dominoes, if so.

RUMOR! The Grizzlies are trying to grab Luol Deng or Jeff Green, reports Sir Stein.

FORM A F--KING EXPLANATION: About Stan Van Gundy’s defensive strategy.

DO NOT RUSH THE COURT: Hey fans, you’re not allowed on the basketball court during play. Not in the NBA, not in Europe, not anywhere. Let this fan getting knocked-the-heck-out by a Turkish player be a lesson to you.

SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT: 13 NBA benches are better than the Knicks.

Happy Thursday. See you next time.