Chris Paul invented high-fives for heads. It’s a bad idea

Good morning. Let’s basketball.

IF THIS WERE SHARK TANK AND I WERE A SHARK I WOULD PASS ON THIS ONE: Chris Paul was like, “I invented a high-five but for heads, let’s see how it works, my friend DeAndre Jordan,” and DeAndre Jordan was like “OK, Chris” and then Chris was like “Ow, that hurts, never do that again.”

COULD IT HAPPEN? I explain why none of the head coaches of the worst NBA teams should be fired, and how this could be the first season in at least 35 years without an in-season coach firing. Fingers crossed for you, Alvin Gentry! (And Erik Spoelstra?)

LOL NO: The Warriors are not trading Klay Thompson.

SALTY: Amar’e Stoudemire, finishing his career in Israel, talks off his corrective goggles and offers them to an official. Because Amar’e believes him to be vision impaired, you see?

KRISTAPS PORZINGIS STOLE DIRK’S MOVE IN FRONT OF DIRK AND DIRK COULD DO NAUGHT BUT WATCH.

NICE WORK, PHIL: In the course of an interview with the god Jackie MacMullan, Phil Jackson manages to anger Maverick Carter by referring to LeBron’s posse, state LeBron wants special treatment, call Mike Conley’s salary almost insane, insinuate Jeff Hornacek is running the triangle offense wrong, and seems to say he would have opted out of his Knicks contract if there was a lockout.

SCORES GALORE ...

Magic 69, Pacers 88
Mavericks 77, Knicks 93
Thunder 88, Pistons 104
Celtics 105, Pelicans 106
Sixers 88, Rockets 115
Heat 90, Spurs 94
Grizzlies 102, Jazz 96
Nets 95, Clippers 127

DIRTY: Kobe Bryant reveals the Lakers’ genius plan to turn opposing teammates against each other.

NOT ALWAYS POPPIN’: Jonathan Abrams on the rough first season of Gregg Popovich as Spurs coach.

VICIOUS RUSSELL WESTBROOK DUNK ALERT.

INHERIT THE SPURS: Shea Serrano on fatherhood and the San Antonio Spurs.

JAMES HARDEN’S DIFFICULT BASKETBALL GENIUS.

BASKETBALL GRAD SCHOOL: Stanley Johnson on what participating on the USA Select Team under Gregg Popovich meant to him.

HEART OF OAKLAND: Great profile of Ivan Rabb by Marc Spears.

KARMA: Marcus Smart’s flop ruined a perfectly good Solomon Hill jam. The Celtics lost by one. You do the math.

HOW FITTING: Kevin Love is modeling the “3-in-1 parka” for Banana Republic.

NEXT UP: The NBA TV doubleheader leads with a big Raptors-Cavaliers battle (7 p.m. ET) followed by Bulls vs. Blazers (10 p.m. ET). (Shout out to my SNES circa 1992.) League Pass has a late-night Battle of the Frisky with the Nets and Lakers (10:30).

AND FINALLY: Ball is life.

Be excellent to each other.