Steve Kerr already had the best Sean Spicer joke from this weekend, poking fun at President Donald Trump’s new press secretary by exaggerating his short-lived career playing for the Magic.
NBA TV pokes fun at Lakers’ record-setting loss with ‘alternative stats’
It was the second-best alternate facts joke from the NBA on Sunday.
The NBA TV folks had another one, right after the Lakers lost by a franchise-record 49 points to the Mavericks (who still have a worse record than them, might you!) on Sunday. Trump’s former campaign manager and current counselor Kellyanne Conway had referred to Spicer’s ideas as “alternative facts” — something Merrian-Webster even shot down — and the joke played off that.
That was the box score! Ignore the box score you can find on NBA.com, SBNation.com, ESPN.com, CBSSports.com ... well, OK, nearly every sports-related dot com. That’s the mainstream media trying to deceive you! The truth is, Kobe Bryant scored 80 points on 30-of-60 shooting, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar added 23 points, and the Lakers won 140-82 on Sunday. How dare you liars say otherwise!?
(Note that Dirk Nowitzki had a 30-and-16 game on ... 20-of-36 shooting. Last I checked, field goals are at least two points. Also, that NBA TV used the championship Mavericks roster just reminds me of that time Dallas actually eviscerated Los Angeles in the playoffs.)
OK. That was fun. But I have a real concern!
You might see that Lakers lineup and think, “They’re Finals favorites for sure.” And I get what you’re saying. Kobe AND Kareem on the same team? Magic Johnson, Jerry West, and James Worthy rounding out the starting five!?
Look closer, though, and that starting five scored all 140 points. Not a single point — not one — came from the bench, despite most of this game being a blowout! The starters must have scored 140 by themselves, sat down the entire fourth quarter, and watched as their bench failed to score for 12 straight minutes.
That worries me. You’ve got to have a good bench to win in the playoffs, and this Lakers squad clearly doesn’t. They have a good starting five, but they must have jeopardized their cap so much signing them all. Clearly, that lack of depth will end up costing Los Angeles in the postseason. You heard it here first.
