General

Hayes vs. Hall: Finding this Season’s Mongo

Oct 1, 2008, 9:00 PM UTC

Each week, SN NCAA football writers Matt Hayes and Spencer Hall put aside their petty differences to come together via instant messenger ... and argue about their differences. This week’s topics: Big 12, 'Bama and Vandy.

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Hayes:

Let’s talk about Mizzou. â†µ

â†µHall: I'm very suspicious of them. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Why are you holding back? Come on, give it up. â†µ

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â†µHall: Their defense. I have a few ironclad rules in life. One, stay away from brown liquor and white pants. They’re both disasters waiting to happen. Two, people never change. This means I think their defense is still shot through with holes, and that the early canary in the coalmine is their performance against Illinois. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Their offense is terrific. Better than Florida’s. Better than anyone. The defense, I agree, has some issues, but this is also an upperclassmen-dominated team. And who in the Big 12 -- other than OU -- can outscore them? Or in OU's case, stop them on defense? â†µ

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â†µHall: I think Oklahoma State could hold serve with them. That's in two weeks. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Okie State? Are you serious? Spencer, Spencer, Spencer. You want to talk house of cards? They will beat Okie State by 30-plus. â†µ

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â†µHall: We're talking possibilities, I'm giving you possibilities. â†µ

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â†µHayes: They may score 60 on Okie State. â†µ

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â†µHall: Fine. The 40-YEAR-OLD MEN of OK State might score 61. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Well, it's possible my hair will re-grow too. â†µ

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â†µHall: My point remains: it's a shootout conference, and anyone with a half-capable secondary can hold serve once in a while and make things tricky. Once: That's all it might take. (Says a guy who just watched his team lose by a single point.) â†µ

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â†µHayes: Never. Gonna. Happen. â†µ

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â†µHall: Also, two other possibilities of real live merit: Texas and Kansas. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Ill give you Texas. I like the Horns more with each week. â†µ

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â†µHall: Texas is more of a gut pick because I trust Muschamp's ability to scheme against the offense. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Defense is playing really well under Muschamp, but the Jayhawks? KU isn't nearly as complete as they were last year. â†µ

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â†µHall: In a bullet-strewn conference, OU and Texas are the only ones wearing flak jackets. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Although re: KU/Mizzou: that's a rivalry game, and if Mizzou is 11-0 at that point, helluva lot of pressure in that one. Dude, it's still OU and Mizzou in that conference. â†µ

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â†µHall: I remain skeptical until their defense mounts a stand or two. â†µ

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â†µHayes: OK, let's talk SEC. Now, what are the odds Bama flat out plays Louisiana-Monore-ugly against Kentucky this weekend? â†µ

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â†µHall: Very high, especially because they'll face the best interior pass rush they've seen yet. Myron Pryor is a bad, bad man. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Weird how we're speaking of UK's defense, but that is a big, big trap game for Bama, which is a young team still learning how to deal with success. â†µ

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â†µHall: It would be if Kentucky’s offense were three or four games further along. â†µ

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â†µHayes: John Parker Wilson throws a couple of picks on the negative side of the field and that thing can get interesting. â†µ

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â†µHall: We all know their game plan now, right? It doesn't vary. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Yeah, beat you over the head into submission. That's a good gameplan 9 out of 10 times. â†µ

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â†µHall: Offense: Go that way ---> Defense, go that way <--- Pretty simple and brutal. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Ball good. Turnover bad. Grunt. â†µ

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â†µHall: They are a Mongo team, pulling up in front of the saloon on a brahma bull. â†µ

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â†µHayes: They are SO Mongo. There couldn’t be a more Mongo team. â†µ

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â†µHall: Unless someone's got a candy gram out there, they're unstoppable. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Biggest surprise this fall? â†µ

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â†µHall: Vandy. â†µ

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â†µHayes: Vandy? I think that ride ends this week, unfortunately. â†µ

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â†µHall: It might, but the way the Auburn offense is playing means 14 points could get you eggroll against them. â†µ

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â†µHayes: What will Gameday do in Nashville? How much can you talk about Vandy? At some point five minutes in, it's gonna be, “OK, we've covered Vandy.” â†µ

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â†µHall: They'll buy a nice pair of khakis and some boat shoes to fit in. â†µ

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â†µHayes: What, no boot-scootin downtown? â†µ

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â†µHall: Might be some of that, but that would make Fowler very, very uncomfortable. â†µ

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â†µHayes: It totally would. â†µ

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â†µHall: I don't think he can move his hips. They’re probably molded straight to his body like a Ken doll’s. â†µ

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This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.