If Coaches Were Forced to Use Fisticuffs ...

By Dave “Large” Larzelere
In that my weekly boxing notes almost certainly would be even more ignored here than they usually are, I’m giving the sweet science a break this week at The Sporting Blog and turning my attention, as the calendar insists that I must, to college basketball.
Admittedly, I have to dig deep to make this topic interesting to me. But I think I’ve done it. Here follows my All-Time Fantasy List of Big-Time Pay-Per-View Fights Between Famous College Basketball Coaches Both Real and Fictitious:
Bobby Knight (-230) v. John Thompson Jr. (+200)
Of course you need to get Knight into this discussion, but it’s tough, because he really seems like the Tyson of college basketball coaches. But I’m happy with the Knight/Thompson showdown – it’s a real heavyweight corker, feels a little bit like my Holmes/Cooney, although even with Knight giving away a lot of reach and a lot of weight, I still have him as more than a 2-1 favorite. Just hard to imagine him losing a fight to anyone, really. Maybe Knight/Tyson is a better bout.
Rick Pitino (-140) v. John Calipari (+130)
Man, I don’t even care about the fight itself on this one – I just want to see the “24/7.†With these two guys hyping themselves, by the time they get into the ring we’re going to think it’s Chavez/Whitaker.
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Gary Williams (-460) v. Roy Williams (+400)
I love this fight. Odds-wise, it’s not even close, and really the only thing to bet on would be the over-under on rounds, which I’d probably set at 5. One thing, though – Gary Williams, with that beet-red face of his and his clearly raging blood pressure… doesn’t it seem like he probably cuts easily? Something to think about before you go betting the house on ole Gary at nearly 5-1.
Gene Hackman in Hoosiers (-310) v. Josh Lucas in Glory Road (+280)
Lucas is younger, probably stronger, but Hackman is just plain meaner, and that goes a long way with the handicappers. Norman Dale got religion and everything (Barbara Hershey will do that to a man) but the beast within was never very far from the surface. I always thought they should have done an alternate ending for Hoosiers where Jimmy Chitwood misses the last shot and then Coach Norm beats the crap out of him. And that’s the Norman Dale that I have putting Josh Lucas to sleep in under seven.
Mike Krzyzewski v. Larry Brown (Even Odds)
This thing has Corrales/Castillo I written all over it. There’s no give-up in either of these dogs, no doubt. I see somebody getting stopped sometime around the tenth or the eleventh from pure exhaustion. I just can’t decide who it will be. Conditioning will be a big factor.↵