Tennis Dad Introduces New Way to Cheat

When introducing our children to the world of athletic competition, we all know there is one code of ethics we must teach them before all others: Winning isn’t everything. Just kidding, that’s some weak nonsense. Of course winning is everything, that’s why we play. No one wants to raise a loser. And that’s why the mantra that kids must learn early and often is “if you aren’t cheating, you aren’t trying.” ↵↵Demetri Korzh, father of 8 year-old tennis-star-in-training Anastasiya, fully grasps this concept: ↵

↵↵⇥Anastasiya Korzh was disqualified from the under-10 girls tournament of the Canterbury Junior Winter Tournament in New Zealand when officials found a receiver similar to a rugby referee’s earpiece with a box at the base of the back and a cord under the shirt up to the earpiece and headband.↵⇥↵⇥The earpiece was hidden under the girl’s headband.↵⇥

↵⇥↵⇥Rob Wilkinson, the tournament referee and Canterbury Tennis manager of tennis operations, said officials became suspicious because of an increasing number of questioned calls.↵⇥

↵↵So, officials only became suspicious after she started questioning calls? What, that large box protruding from the back of her shirt didn’t give away that something was amiss? Stupid New Zealanders. This explains why they’re “pretty much the most disliked race in this whole country.“↵