General

Miami Is The Anti-Samson

Oct 14, 2009, 9:00 PM UTC

â†µIf you’ve been wondering where Miami’s newfound competence comes from, you just need to check out one of Jacory Harris’s composed, detailedâ†µpostgame interviews. You’ll notice two things: 1. Harris has a tendency to drop extremely detailed play explanations in response to banal sideline reporter questions, which is awesome, and 2. dang that kid’s got a crazy detailed “U SWAG” shaved into his head.â†µ

â†µâ†µObvious conclusion: the Hurricanes’ power comes from extremely intricate short haircuts instead of no haircuts whatsoever. And this is the guy doing it:â†µ

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â†µCheck out the end result on Jordan Futch:â†µ

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â†µâ†µKid better keep his helmet on or he’s going to get put in the end zone and told to make nice with the kiddies. The Get Right Kutz MySpace page has a bunch of additional crazy intricate haircuts for your perusal (and the guy with the clippers flipping you off for no apparent reason but it’s cool, it’s cool); this guy’s “side hustle” is about to go full-time, I think. â†µ

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â†µLove the Scarface poster on the all-white wall in the background. The story of how this guy ended up cutting the 'Canes' hair is aâ†µdistinctly Miami one: â†µ

â†µâ†µâ‡¥â†µâ‡¥“When I’m not cutting hair I’m a correction officer for the state of Florida,” Rivera said. “I work in prisons and four years ago I met Javarris James’ brother who was incarcerated at the time. Through his brother I got to know Baby J and soon became good friends with former Canes wide receiver Lance Leggett.”â†µâ‡¥

â†µâ†µâ†µHere’s where Orson Swindle’s mediationâ†µon how strange the city of Miami and the program it spawned are, because it’s pitch perfect for a program that found a barber because their starting running back’s brother was in the joint:â†µ

â†µâ†µâ‡¥â†µâ‡¥They may start brawls for no reason on the sidelines, they may ride boom-and-bust cycles of probation and championship every decade or so, and they may welcome the yellow flags following every touchdown celebration. They are also, like the city they spring from, monstrous and monstrously tough, a program and team impossible to be neutral about in any sense of the word. No matter the chemistry, you react to them.â†µâ‡¥

â†µâ†µâ†µI’m sure there’s a South Bend equivalent of this. Jimmy Clausen is going to come roaring out of the locker room against USC with a leprechaun shaved into his head and it will only be the third-worst haircut of his playing career. (Numbers oneâ†µand two.)â†µI have a shiny nickel on this happening.â†µ

â†µâ†µ(H/T to Theâ†µSeventh Floor)â†µ

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This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.

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