You Lost the Games to Rio and All You Got is This Lousy Shirt

Olympic-sized frownies (link not completely SFW) abounded at the Chicago rally after attendees discovered mid-morning that the Windy City was the first of the four finalists eliminated from contention for 2016 hosting duties.
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↵Distraught Second City residents have taken to writing their elegies of games that never were. And while the hosting duties can be a fine fillip for civic pride, let’s take a minute to remember that hosting never quite reaps the financial windfall that it supposed to, and that venues created specifically for them linger on in disuse not more than a few years hence the games.
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↵While a disappointment for Chicago locals and our president, who lobbied hard on the city’s behalf, the financial outlay necessary for arranging and orchestrating the Olympics can be better allocated.
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↵And, hey, you can still have the shirts anyway. It’s like having all the memento while saving yourself the burden of actually holding the games!↵