Weekend Wake Up: Brewer Slams (Kobe Hurt), Suns Steal, Pat Patriot Popped, Tiger Turns Tail

Strange Brew. Corey Brewer was expected to be Scottie Pippen Lite when he was drafted out of Florida, but has disappointed since becoming one of the T’Wolves. Last night, in claiming the airspace over Derek Fisher with the above dunk, he made up for some of his failings. Unfortunately for Minny, that slam came in a loss: Not even a fractured finger could stop Kobe Bryant from leading the Lakers to an 11th straight win.

Valley of the Who Won? Phoenix beat Orlando 106-103 in a topsy-turvy game in the desert, but the strange final seconds -- the last 2.5 ticks featured two jump balls -- were what got everyone buzzing about Joey Crawford on Twitter.

Perp Patriot. As if this season weren’t frustratingly mediocre enough for Bill Belichick’s crew, the man who plays their mascot was arrested in a Rhode Island sex sting. No word on if Bill Simmons will have to leap off his spring-loaded seat on the Pats’ bandwagon to craft a punchline.

Tiger, Tiger: Yearning’s Blight. Finally admitting to the “infidelity” that has spiraled into “a series of mistresses from all walks of life,” Tiger Woods announced Friday that he would be taking an “indefinite break” from pro golf. This definitely means two things: One, that Tiger’s absence will push ratings for early-season events without him further into divots, and two, that the tune-up for the Masters he picks to begin his 2010 season will be overhyped like no other golf tournament ever.

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