General

With T.O., Titans Poised to Become Team Emo

Mar 6, 2009, 6:10 PM UTC

With everyone eagerly awaiting which team is desperate enough to take a chance on T.O., the guys at Kissing Suzy Kolber have a rock-solid lead. Apparently, Owens was spotted in Tenneessee with Drew Rosenhaus. This comes from someone named Mase Dog, so you know it’s true:â†µâ†µâ‡¥Terrell Owens and Drew Rosenhaus were spotted at the Nashville airport at around 7 o’clock this morning. Could Eldorado be headed to the land of Titans? We say (without the slightest hint of journalistic credibility), YES! I mean hell, it’s not like they were there to check out the Grand Ole Opry with Peter King. TO will probably be a great influence on Vince Young, and a move to the Titans would bring him back to Tennessee, the state where he played his college ball.â†µâ†µT.O. and Vince Young ... together? This would officially make the Titans the most emo team ever. Here are five changes you’ll see from the franchise next season when this inevitably happens:â†µ

â†µ1. All team communications to be sung through Autotune.
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â†µ2. The official team color will be Despair, with all players required to wear studded white belts and mascara.
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â†µâ†µ3. Team apparel will be created by Urban Outfitters.
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â†µâ†µ4. Country standards and Rage Against the Machine played at stadium replaced by Death Cab For Cutie and My Chemical Romance. (Still more cheerful than Cleveland.)â†µ

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â†µ5. Titans become first team to be sponsored by Zoloft. That’s Zoloft: Because Your Daddy Never Loved You. (Remember when he bought you a VW instead of a BMW?) â†µ

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â†µSpencer Hall assisted with the creation of this post. Whatever parts you don't like are the ones he wrote.â†µ

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This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.

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