
The Hangover Cure: Week 1

A sober review of the weekend in college football, because you might really need it after your Saturday.↵↵Key Takeaways. BYU could be really good. Dez Bryant already is. Florida’s athleticism is lethal, even at half speed. You will hear “McCoy to Shipley” a lot this fall. Alabama is only getting better with new wrinkles. The lower end of the ACC may not even belong in I-AA. Matt Barkley’s best plays are handoffs to Stafon Johnson, Allen Bradford, and Joe McKnight. ↵
↵↵The highest stratum of the polls is top-heavy with what seems like a few great teams: Florida, Texas, USC, Alabama. Beyond that realm, there is much confusion, with about a dozen unproven teams capable of being voted fifth or 15th.↵
↵↵Delirious. Michigan and Notre Dame fans heralding their programs’ returns to glory might want to remember that it is fairly easy to impress against Western Michigan and Nevada. Cal fans, this goes for you, too: Hosting and crushing Maryland isn’t exactly heavy lifting. Sure, wins over Charleston Southern, Louisiana-Monroe, and San Jose State aren’t confirmations of greatness. But the teams that won those games have at least done a little showing and proving with their current cores in past years.↵
↵↵Oklahoma State shut down Georgia in Stillwater, but, really, were the Bulldogs supposed to be an offensive juggernaut their first time out without Matthew Stafford and Knowshon Moreno? I’m still not sold on any aspect of the Cowboys other than the potent Zac Robinson-Dez Bryant connection.↵
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↵Tremendous. Pick a comic book-esque sound effect: Michigan's Denard Robinson's "WHOOSH", Toledo's Eric Page's "Slam-BANG," (it's play No. 3), or Baylor's Kendall Wright making Wake Forest defenders' ankles "SCHWING" on a cut that shook five of them at once. No video on the last one, sadly. ↵
↵↵Statistical Standout. Forget Central Michigan’s Dan LeFevour as “Tebow Lite,” especially after Arizona shut his Chippewas down. UAB’s Joe Webb spent his Saturday rocketing by Rice, accruing 221 yards through the air, 189 more on the ground, and two touchdowns each way.↵
↵↵Potent Quotables. Terrelle Pryor holding forth on Michael Vick with foot in mouth. Florida’s Riley Cooper gets it all out.↵
↵↵Headline of the Week. “HAWK-BLOCKED.“↵
↵↵Campus Correspondence. Syracuse’s Daily Orange: “Instead of a storybook ending on a day created for overwhelming optimism, (Greg) Paulus learned a vital lesson in the ways of a collegiate quarterback.↵
↵↵Nate Triplett intercepted a directionless ball fluttering through air. Visions of Paulus carried off the Carrier Dome field as a hero suddenly vanished.”↵
↵Any ideas for what you want from this column? Feel free to leave them in the comments.↵
This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.
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