The fifth men’s National Marathon, which was held in DC on Saturday, was won by Mr. Michael Wardian. Again. The 35-year-old Wardian has now won the event four times. Keep in mind that this year’s National Marathon featured over 3,000 runners. When you accomplish something as impressive as this, even the emptiest jingoisms somehow ring true.
Michael Wardian Wins Another National Marathon, Right To Utter Jingoisms
↵↵“You gotta live each race as your last,” Wardian said. “You gotta seize the moment.”
↵↵See? If Wardian gave up three runs over seven innings in the NLDS, I’d roll my eyes, but if you accomplish something as amazing as Wardian has, you get a free pass to say something as by-the-book as you want. If Neil Armstrong had stepped off the lunar lander and declared, “You just gotta give 110%,” nobody would mind.
↵On the other side of the coin, if Villanova manages to beat 10-seed Saint Mary’s today, coach Jay Wright had better say something that hasn’t been said before. “Our guys played hard” is unacceptable. Recite the lyrics from Kid Rock’s “I Am The Bullgod.” Anything.
↵UPDATE: A vigilant commenter has correctly pointed out that I am using the word “jingoism” incorrectly. WHOOPS. I would have used “cliché,” but it seemed, well, cliché.
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