Is Famous BALLER Marquis Daniels In A GANG??? You Tell ME!!!

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my working on the internet, it’s this: Never, ever, read hip-hop gossip sites. At best, they’ll make you dumber, and at worst, they’ll shake your faith in humanity.

But sometimes I can’t help myself. The raw, uncut absurdity is too much to ignore. Like this header, from the Most Visited Urban Website in the World:

“NBA GANG BANGER??? Baller caught uses GANG LINGO . . . And Gang Symbols . . . On his PERSONAL WEBPAGE!!!”

I just love all the randomly capitalized words. And the question marks??? Exclamation points!!!

...And that’s how I got sucked into the case of Marquis Daniels, “blood-affiliated” “gangster”.

Apparently his Twitter profile picture, since changed, used to be a pair of red sneakers and a red hat, both trademarks of the bloods. AND THERE’S MORE. He’s also been known to occasionally replace “c’s” with “k’s”, apparently to avoid typing out the first letter of the Bloods’ biggest rivals, the Crips.

OPEN AND SHUT CASE, RIGHT???

Eh, whatever.

Marquis Daniels will forever be known to be me as “highest-looking athlete I’ve ever seen.” Whether he’s in a gang, wants to appear to be in a gang, or has friends in a gang... That’s all beside the point. To my knowledge, he’s the highest-looking basketball player of all time, and that’s all that matters.

But back to Media Takeout, a.k.a. THE MOST POPULAR URBAN WEBSITE EVER.

They make a good point here. Imagine how much energy it’d take to be in a gang, and go out of your way to write messages without using the letter ‘C’. First, you’d have to figure out what you want to say, then you’d have to go back and meticulously remove each offending letter, creating as many as illiterate words as possible, proving to everyone that you’re “down for the cause” and totally NOT down with grammar. It adds a whole ‘nother layer to the process of communication.

As Media Takeout writes, “this is taking STUPIDITY to the next level.”

All to appear URBAN and AUTHENTIC!!! ARGH. So much STUPIDITY.

Seriously. Writing purposefully illiterate shit to prove your authenticity to the world... Is there no end to this STUPIDITY ??? . . . But then, maybe Media Takeout’s in a gang that we don’t know about?