I’ll be honest: I have no real concept of what the Winter Meetings really are like. Is it a big trade show, where each team has representative in a booth, passing out pamphlets and crappy keychains? Don’t know.
On The Winter Meetings
But I do know that it’s probably a good thing that I’m not involved in creating the agenda for the Winter Meetings.
Thank you for meeting me here, in the winter, everybody. Let's just jump right in. @SI_Vault tweeted this picture of Steve Avery from 1992:
Okay, okay. Settle down. We have a lot to get through. Let's break this down -- divide and conquer. Okay, Twins, your job is to get to the bottom of the sweater. Was the collar built in? Looks like it. We need to find a manufacturer on that. Alright, Tigers, what's up with the hair? How long did that go on? Put as many people as possible on it.Mets, your job is to get some answers on those pants. Were they pegged on purpose? I mean ... they can't be, right? We need to know if that was a brand of pants that were recalled for rolling up and cutting off circulation. I'd start with the FTC archives.
And Braves. Sweet Braves. You need to cull through Avery's medical records. Is it possible that his arm problems started because he was compensating for his sneakers being either over- or under-pumped? What kind of pump was he giving himself? Tight, like he was checking his blood pressure? Or just a little extra squeeze for support?
Thank god we have all week. Again, thank you for meeting me here, in the winter.
See More:
